Selena Kitt

Naughty Bits

Chapter One

If my mum and dad found out about my collection of porn in the shed, I knew they’d both kick-off and I’d be sleeping under a bench in the Underground, buying papers to keep me warm-instead of buying them like I was now, looking for a job. As it was, they were on at me to find something, and fast. I didn’t get why I had to figure it all out, what I wanted to do with the rest of my life. What was the rush?

My sister, Dawn, got to preen around the health club at her summer job. So why was I supposed to find something “responsible?” Dawn had been living at home since she finished school, aside from a couple of disastrous attempts at living with a roommate that my parents had ended up paying more for in the long run, anyway.

My parents made all sorts of exceptions for her. I had hoped that her laziness, or as my mother put it, her “lack of focus,” might pave the way for me to spend some time loafing off after I finished school, too, but no-apparently, Dawn got the welcome mat, but I got threatened with the boot. I didn’t get it.

I shut the back door and looked up at the sky. We didn’t get days like this in Surrey very often-so bright and blue and clear. We spent most of our time walking around in the usual London grey, looking at a hazy kind of film over the sun. Days like today made me remember being a kid, endless summers with no responsibilities, no cares, no worries. So much for that, I thought, flopping the paper down on the patio table and glaring at it.

I sat in one of the folding chairs and took a highlighter out of my pocket. The first thing I circled was a construction company. Maybe I could find something working outside-get a tan, build some muscle. That might lead to getting a girlfriend, I thought hopefully. That got me to thinking about Julie Entwistle, the girl rumoured to wear nothing under her skirts in sixth form. She sat right next to me in English, but I never did see anything-not that I didn’t try. For a girl who was supposed to be a slag, she sure kept her legs together a lot.

Thinking about Julie’s skirt, and more importantly, what might be found under her skirt, made my jeans uncomfortably tight. I shifted in the chair, shoving at my crotch and turning the page of the newspaper, re-focusing my efforts. The ad that caught my eye read: Exotic dancers wanted to perform at private, solo, and bachelor parties… I snorted-so much for trying to focus. Now my cock was officially hard. I glanced over at the shed, thinking of the boards my dad stored in there that “might come in handy” some day. They came in handy for hiding my porn collection.

I folded the paper up and tucked it under my arm, heading toward the shed. My dad’s toolbox doubled as a step stool and was perfect for sitting on. I dug under the boards, pulling out my meagre collection. TwoPlayboys and aPenthouse, although the latter was a “Letters” edition, and the stories were pretty hot. The last one was my favourite, a magazine calledNaughty Bits, which was way more hardcore than the others. I’d never seen another one before or since, although believe me, I’d looked.

I opened it up to my favourite page, and there she was. Blonde, although clearly dyed because her pubes were dark, a full-breasted and full-bodied girl-really unusual for most spreads nowadays where the models were like stick figures. This woman was, well… a woman.

The next best part was the layout itself-a girl all alone on her bed looking at porn. Did girls do that? I loved how she rolled over and spread her legs, revealing that there was nothing under her skirt. She started masturbating, and would you look at that, next page, here comes her brother. Probably it was her boyfriend, but I had this fantasy in my head that it was her brother. And the next thing you know, she’s sucking him off. God, how I wished it was that easy. Hi there, whoops, didn’t mean to interrupt, but since I’m here, zzziiiip, flop, here’s this hard cock you can suck…

I unzipped my jeans and tugged them down a little, slipping my hand into my boxers. Nowhere near as big as the guy positioning his cock at her pink little hole (I loved that picture, her fingers spreading herself open for him like that. Gah! Did girls do that?) but respectable enough-nice and thick, and most definitely stiff. She did it for me, every time. I started masturbating, my eyes skipping from the wet pink of her cunt to her thick, dark pink nipples. I spent some time there, wanking away and staring at the slit between her legs. She spread it open with both hands, and there was a little hole there, right where I wanted to slide my cock, a small dark hollow leading to heaven.